What Sabina Nessa’s death taught me about the current state of society
The UK's delayed response to Sabina Nessa's death highlights the bigger problem in society
Photo Credit: Jonathan Brady/PA
Words by Katrina Mirpuri
By now, you’ll have seen and heard the name Sabina Nessa. In the last few days, the story of her murder has been plastered across the mainstream news and social media, but that wasn’t the case earlier this week.
Sabina Nessa was a 28-year-old Primary School teacher who was killed last Friday, September 17th, whilst embarking on a 5-minute walk through a park on her way to meet a friend. Her story is not dissimilar to other cases in the UK this year, and it comes just after the news that a missing blogger named, Gabrielle Petito was also found dead in Wyoming. Violent crimes against women are on the rise, and the Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan described the situation as an “epidemic when it comes to violence against women and girls we need a whole system approach.”
This also comes just six months after the brutal murder of Sarah Everard which was a death that triggered a mass movement to make our streets safer. The keys in hand, the “text me when you’re home” and the constant looks over the shoulder aren’t enough to keep us alive.
When I heard of Sabina’s murder, my heart broke. I was scrolling aimlessly through the BBC News homepage and found the story at the bottom of the page. “Not again”, I thought to myself. She was a similar age to me, she lived in London and she was walking around in the evening as any of us would. It’s a highly relatable tragedy. Following the news last week, I prepared myself for memorial posts, news stories, and a public murder investigation but I was shocked to find that only a small handful of posts about her death online made it into the mainstream media. Her body was found on Saturday, and I compulsively refreshed the news for updates. On Tuesday, I saw a police appeal that asked for the public to provide information on any suspicious behaviour in the Kidbrooke area where Sabina was killed.
Photo Credit: Rob Pinney/Getty Images
“If the last week has taught us anything, it’s that we are in dire need of societal change”
Come Wednesday morning, I checked Google again, and I saw a page and a half of search results. Why was this not all over social media? The police specifically asked for public help. I decided to take matters into my own hands and create a 5 page Instagram post, clearly stating what had happened, how to help, and who to contact. It was shared far and wide, reaching just under 3 million people. Messages poured in asking: “why am I only learning about this now?” and “why does this have no publicity compared to Sarah Everard?”.
Everard’s death was particularly shocking due to a police officer being involved, however, that doesn’t discredit the fact that another innocent woman has been murdered. To top it off, the killer was yet to be found. Those who made noise online, marched, and mourned for Sarah Everard appeared to have gone quiet. Allyship can be performative on social media, however, many couldn’t be bothered to take the stage in this case.
31-year-old Everard was highly relatable, so how is 28-year-old Sabina less relatable? Do people only relate to people they look like? These are the questions that I and thousands of other women of colour ask ourselves. I thought to myself “If I went missing, would anyone care?”
By Thursday the news picked up, just in time for Sabina’s candlelight vigil on Friday. Hundreds attended. We stood holding candles in solidarity whilst Sabina’s family sobbed. It was a bleak way to spend a Friday evening.
A recurring phrase that follows the death of these women is “end male violence”. Considering that more than 9 out of 10 killings are done by men, the conversation has recently shifted into what we can do to prevent male violence. Following recent events, plenty of men took to social media to share their support with this issue however, when it came to showing up in person, there was a stark lack of male presence at the vigil. The men that did attend mainly appeared to be with spouses. In contrast, many women arrived alone or came in groups.
If the last week has taught us anything, it’s that we are in dire need of societal change.
One simple social media post snowballed and propelled people to take matters into their own hands, however, it is only the tip of the iceberg in terms of evolving beyond these gruesome times. Societal change can’t happen purely on social media. It requires us to educate each other, to have more uncomfortable discussions, and physically turn up when need be.
Photo Credit: Hesther Ng/Sopa Images/Rex/Shutterstock